Is there a spanko gene? It's easy to blame my relatives for my blue eyes, my red hair, and my height, but I've always wondered about what (or who) is responsible for me being a spanko. I mean, I can't remember a time when spanking wasn't on my mind. In the battle of nature vs nurture, I really have come to believe that nature had a part in this one.
Of course, I haven't the slightest idea of who in my family is also a spanko. Like many of you, I haven't shared my desire with my family, so I wouldn't expect them to share either. Frankly, I would be weirded out if they did. I don't think it's my mom. She caught me looking at a spanking website once and was thoroughly concerned for me because she thought I had gotten sucked into this demeaning mindset by strange older men. I doubt my older sister is one. She's newly married, and let's just say her new husband isn't Spanker material. It could have been my dad. He passed away five years ago, when I was 16, and we were very close. I caught him watching porn on our computer once or twice, but nothing spanking related that I can recall. Hmm... maybe my grandparents? Or maybe, I'm the start of a new trend myself.
It makes me wonder about my descendants. If and when I get married, I have pretty much concluded it will be to another spanko. I've tried vanilla relationships and was bored by date two. Is it more likely for two spankos to have offspring who will inherit said spank-happiness? Or is it completely random, a fluke that shows itself only rarely? I knew I should have paid better attention in my science classes. :-/
The first 11 years of my life were spent without knowing my biological father. When I finally got to meet him, I stayed in his childhood room where I found spanking magazines tucked away in the back of one of his drawers. I also found a paddle which read "Board of Education". While we've never directly spoken to each other about our (very likely) mutual interest, other hints have sprung up since we first met each other. Perhaps there is something to this theory of spanko genetics. :)
ReplyDeleteI dunno where the spanking thing came from in my family but I do wonder about my grandparents... interesting column!
ReplyDeleteHi Sophie,
ReplyDeleteI just discovered your blog and it looks like you're off to a fine start!
As for your question, my husband and I are both dedicated lifelong spankos. Our adult daughter, however, has never shown these tendencies. When Randy makes thinly veiled spanking jokes aimed at me while in her presence, she just smiles and rolls her eyes. I can't say what she does in the privacy of her own home, but my read is that her interests lie elsewhere.
Best wishes with your blog.
Bonnie
An interesting question to ponder. Can there be a single gene that makes a spanko? I wonder what a spanko is exactly or if we, who consider ourselves spankos, are all the same thing. Why do I like to be the spanker, and you like to be the spankee? Are those two types from the same genetic trait? Is there something masculine and feminine involved? Something about how we were raised, or the environment in general? What about the differences in spankos? For example, some people are totally into disciplinary spanking without sex involved, while others it's just sex and not punishment. Then, even if it's all about eroticism, it seems to me there's a meaningful difference between someone who's looking for humiliation, and someone else who's looking for romance. For many spankos, the dom-sub part is at the center of it. Others not. And do you want to be nurtured when spanked, or something colder and detached? Why do some have the feelings almost from birth, and some not til they're adults? I know for some it can be very fetishistic, in that they obsess about and focus on a particular thing about spanking. Why do spankos from Britain like canes so much? Do we need to be exposed to something before it becomes a fetish, and if the exposure is at a young age, does it have more impact on our kinky development?
ReplyDeleteLike most things that make humans what and who we are, it seems complex to me. Maybe there are lots of different genetic traits that can contribute to being a spanko, and depending on what we're exposed to, and the kinds of relationships we grow up with, we develop needs or make erotic connections that must be satisfied by spanking.
For more anecdotal evidence, I think my mother might have been a bit of a spanko in some way but, if so, repressed. The rest of my immediate family, I don't think so. I wonder how rare an attraction to spanking is. Do we know the percentages? Now that more acknowledged spankos are getting together and having kids, maybe in the future there'll be better statistical evidence of possible genetic influences. And another thing to consider---are spanko parents more or less likely to spank their children? Or are the children more likely to be inadvertently exposed to their parents' involvement in spanking at an early impressionable age? How might it affect them?
Sorry for the length of that, Sophie. I must be interested in the subject. ;)
Sophie, you pose an interesting question. As for me, grewing up in the British school system, I wanted to spank some of my female teachers. Yes, I wanted them to bend over a desk, raise their dressses waist high, pull down their knickers, and cane their bare bottoms. Maybe fpr some it's in the genes, and maybe for some its the enviroment.
ReplyDeleteMalignus-
ReplyDeleteHow intriguing that your dad is a spanko! See, that seems like more than a coincidence to me. Personally, I think there should be a research project on just this topic.
Anon-
It's hard to know for sure, really, and very uncomfortable to ask.
Bonnie-
Thanks so much for stopping by, and I hope you'll continue to! I'm sure there are cases in which the offspring of two spankos do not have the interest at all. I am curious about the statistics of it.
Brett-
You pose a myriad of excellent questions- thanks for such a thoughtful response! I did not even bring into the picture the huge amount of variance in interests within the spanko population.And you bring up another good point: so many spankos, especially the older generations, have repressed these desires and may not be willing to admit them even now. Would it ever be possible to run such a study accurately?
sixofthebest-
I agree, I think there are aspects of both nature and nurture present. Thanks for the comment!
Sophie, thanks for posing the question.....I have no reason to believe that it is genetic and the environment in which I grew up was very 'normal' for post-war UK.
ReplyDeleteI have to say that I have been a 'spanking fan' for as long as I can remember. Before I went to Grammar School at the age of 11 I was a fan and thinking about spanking my primary school teachers. This continued at secondary school where there were a good number of women teachers with spankable bottoms. My favourite though was a lady who taught History and who was my Form teacher at one point.She was very attractive, dressed smartly and had a most spankable bottom. Interestingly, she might well have enjoyed spanking because I often saw her smooting her skirt over her bottom or even standing with both hands holding her bottom.....one hand on each cheek. I know that I would have dearly loved to put her over my knee, lift her 'A' line skirt up at the back, pull her knickers down and spank her lovely, shapely bum....ahhhh!
Aristotle
I think it is genetic. I think my interest started when I became curious in 2nd grade about old naval movies with men being flogged. I got the belt about 6 times at home and the paddle about 4 times in school from 1969-1978. I also got five swats with a wiffle bat for losing a bet over strip poker- get down to your white undies and get the bat.(ouch) I must say I did "chicken out" of many, many opportunites to get myself spanked more. It hurt lots and it was scary, but a day later I was happy it happened.
ReplyDeleteSpanking was a blessing and a curse- I did not have a friend, cousin, or brother who I could trust to do it to me. One friend seemed sympathetic, but once I finally talked him into
hitting me with a stick, he hit me once on the outer hip, once high near the back, and once on the leg. I could take the pain of the leg but I wanted it in the fleshy muscular part of the butt from the mid-cheek area down to the crease.
When I got wet-toweled by bullies in the locker room it was legs and back, and getting hit in the rectum was no fun. Of course it takes skill and care to get the crease without going low and hitting the leg. My HS Spanish teacher used to paddle half-butt and half-leg. People who are not spankos cannot understand why it much be done with a specific sort of implement to a specific region. Hands never hurt me. I liked to be bent over or lying on my tummy to make the pain more intense. I did not need it for sex or for personal growth or for "accountability": for me, I just liked a certain type of pain. Definitely genes.
I might add to the above that, in all honesty, I was a coward. I was scared to death of getting spanked before, during, and right after discipline. In the 30 seconds or so between "bend over" and the first lick, I was as scared of the spanking as I would have been of the electric chair. I would beg for mercy before, and cry during and after. But a few hours later, with my ass still red and warm, I felt like my life was complete, and I wished I could be braver to take more. When a paddling in gym bruised me I spent hours looking at my ass in the bathroom mirror. I would say genes.
ReplyDeleteIt hurt too much to be voluntary.
Hi Sophie, I just came across your blog and am enjoying it very much. After reading this entry I have to share my experience on the matter. A few years ago I was really struggling with my spanko desires and my very vanilla wife. I was afraid the disconnect between us was going to ruin our marriage. One tactic in working through this was to talk to two of my three sisters. In sharing with them I found out that one of them is also a spanko and has been doing role play spanking with her partners in the bedroom (ex-husband, boyfriends) since she was around 20, so for over 20 years. My other sister isn't a spanko per se, but she confided that her primary sexual fantasy is around a very stern male directing her and being a little rough. I was blown away to discover this. Two other data points on the genetics trail in my family involve my children. As a baby, one of my daughters used to slap her pubis hard and fast when I would diaper her and had her diaper off. It always struck me as odd, but of course I just ignored it. Secondly, my son who is now 9, has shown an interest in being spanked since he was 3 or 4. I have seen him create situations when playing with his older sisters and their friends where he'll get swatted on the seat and have even heard him taunt and challenge the girls to spank him. When playing wrestling games with me when he was younger he would "present" his bottom. He still makes references to spanking. His behavior reminds me of my own when I was a boy. We have never spanked our kids and don't talk about spanking. It's possible that environmental factors account for all the spanking interest in my family but it could be genetic. Keep up the great work with your blog! Cheers, GFRI
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